3-Hours With Stella Damasus-Aboderin

by Susan Eyo-Honesty
stella damasus

Long before Jaiye Aboderin, her late husband, the talented singer passed on suddenly in 2004, movie star actress, Stella Damasus-Aboderin had been a hot news item for the print media, especially the tabloids. She became the subject of gossips, some of which were very damaging. But through all of this, Stella maintained a silence almost as thick as a wall. Then came the death, Jaiye, in December 2004, following a heart attack during a basketball match. Events that unfolded after his demise were to spark off yet another round of controversies, all revolving around Stella, the young widow and mother of two girls. Prominent among these controversies was her sudden return to singing and attending events, her age long cold war with some members of her late husband’s family that reared its head all over again, and most recently, the rumoured talks about her relationship with gospel singer, Sammy Okposo, among several allegations levelled against her. Still Stella kept mute, fervently refusing to be forced into any form of reaction, even when friends pressured her to do so. That was the position she held until Friday, 27th of February 2006, when City People’s deputy Editor-In-Chief, Susan-Eyo-Honesty, met with Stella a second time, after a chance meeting a few days before that fateful meeting. This reporter once again, felt a strong desire to enter into the mind of this beautiful celebrity actress, who in her 20’s, has been in the eye of the storm ever since she came into the limelight, as well as being thrown into widowhood unexpectedly. Surprisingly, the City People team while discussing who would be the best face and personality for the City People Quarterly edition for this Valentine’s, Stella’s name was unanimously agreed would be the ideal personality to celebrate, but there was a problem. With all of the bad press that has been generated over time, the question was: would she be willing to break that silence, worse still to the press who’ve been on her case for as long as her career has fared. A combination of favour and mother luck was at work, when what was meant to be a normal chat with Stella, saw her agreeing to a request for a formal interview that same day. And from Cactus, a restaurant on ozumba Mbadiwe, V.I Lagos, it was off to Stella’s Lekki abode that we went, where for 3 hours, like never before, Stella opened up on her life, one year after Jaiye’s death. In this no holds barred interview, Stella spoke to SUSAN EYO-HONESTY about her many problems after Jaiye died, the many controversies that trailed her and how she’s survived it all. It’s very hot and revealing!

 

 

It has been over a year since you lost your husband. What are those things that have gone through your mind since you suffered your loss of Jaiye?

I’ve actually realized the most important things in life that we take advantage of everyday. I’ve realised that physical cash, your name, what you have, what people perceive you to be is not important. The most important thing is how you live, the end result, where everybody goes to when they die. And how you want your children to live, the kind of life, values you want them to have, knowing that nothing is permanent, its here today and the next day, its all gone. And then love for people around you, because that’s when you begin to realise that it could be anybody’s end, today, this minute. So when you realise that anybody can go at any given time, you give the love that you’ve not given before to those that are left behind.

 

How did Jaiye’s death come to you?

I went for a meeting that Friday morning, because the previous night, he had some of his friends over, and he had said that we were going to take them out. So the plan was that, I was going to go for my meeting and then he was supposed to go and play squash with his friend, and then take our friends out. I went for the meeting, and on my way, my car started giving problems, so I called him at about 2.15pm and I told him that my car had started giving me problems. He said when I come back, that the mechanic will come and take it that was the last time I spoke with him. So sometimes around 6pm that day, I got a call from somebody who never calls me, one of his friends, and he said to me that my attention was needed on the Island, that Jaiye needs to see me immediately. And he now asked me that, “does Jaiye have any problem with his health that they didn’t know about?” so I asked him that “what are you talking about?” and he told me that Jaiye had fainted and he needed me to come immediately. At that point, I just felt that something funny was wrong; I was with my sister-in-law, Bena. So we now drove to the Island and as we were getting there, I got another call saying that I should come to the hospital they had taken him to, somewhere near Mega Plaza. So I rushed there, and as I got there, I saw a lot of people there and I was wondering, what they were all doing there dressed in their sports wear. Then I’m wondering, “If this man only fainted, what were they all doing here?” I thought maybe he needed blood and they wanted me to come and identify something. Then I got there and saw people just running away from me. The only person that could come to me was my friend, Kate Henshaw-Nuttal. She just grabbed my hand and said to me that I had to come and see the doctor. Then as we were going, she was whispering to Bena, my in-law, and that one just ran away and started screaming. So I asked, “what’s going on?” so Kate took me upstairs to the Doctor’s office. The doctor now asked me if I was Jaiye’s wife, and I said yes. And I looked around at all his friends that he was playing basketball with, and they were all crying around me. So I asked, “What is going on? Why are you all crying?” Then the doctor said to me that he was sorry, that they did all that they could, but that my husband was dead. I reacted by first laughing out loud. I said to him that he must be kidding; this was the kind of thing I get to hear in movies. I screamed that he couldn’t tell me that. I almost ripped his throat off when I jumped on him. Again he said that he was sorry. I looked at those around me and I was asking Kate “what are you people telling me? My husband is dead at my age, what are you telling me?” Then I saw my brother, my mother came and I just started seeing family members and I’m like “Jesus, what’s really going on?” At that point, I didn’t really know what was happening, except that my brother in-law, my sister’s husband, came and held my hand and said that I had to see my husband’s body, that if I don’t see it, I’ll never believe to accept it. So they took me downstairs to one room, and there he was lying down as if he was sleeping. I tried to wake him up, I ran out of that place and felt it just had to be a dream. Then I thought, “Let me go back there, that I’m very sure it couldn’t have been him.

But lo and behold, I went back in there and it was him.

 

When that happened to you and all the events following his burial took place, what became of you?

Hmm…I was a total wreck, because I really didn’t know who I was. People that knew my husband and I would tell you that we lived our lives around each other. So I really didn’t know how to start life, I really didn’t know what would become of me. I also didn’t really think I would survive it. I just felt so lost and alone. Even when you have family and friends, it’s just never the same, because I just felt at that time that my life had ended. I was actually feeling sorry for my children, because I was saying to myself, “what would they do without their father around?” I felt that I don’t have a life without this man. So what am I going to start doing now? The music I was doing was with him, even my films; he directed 3 or 4 movies that I did for Amaka Igwe. The African dresses that I was making, he was my executive chairman. I was so lost, and I said to myself that the only way I would come out of this is to tell myself that I would survive it. I didn’t know what to think anymore, I lost it totally. I know that there was a time I was talking to myself and didn’t realise that I was doing that, I had thought my thoughts were inside, but it was people around me that were telling me that I was actually thinking aloud. I argued with them that it wasn’t possible, that I was thinking inside my mind. So everything at the time was upside down.

 

How did you relay what happened to the kids?

Well, the kids were very young then, Isabel was 5 and Angelica was 2 years old. Angelica was not a problem because she was just a baby; she didn’t understand what it meant. But with Isabel who was very close to her dad…I just looked at her one day…the day after Jaiye died, she came to my room and she told my sister that she saw her dad near her window, and my sister asked her, “what did he say to you?” and she said “he told me that I should take care of mummy that everything is fine”. So I called her and now said to her that “daddy is in heaven, Jesus had taken him to heaven and you’ll see him one day, but he’s not coming back home” I kept reassuring her that everything will be fine and that I’d do my best to take care of her, but that her dad is always with her. That anytime someone offends her, that she should always remember that Daddy is somewhere around. I always teach them this concept of God, having faith without evidence, without seeing, that she should see her father in that light as well. But once in a while, she’ll still come to me and ask me “are you taking me to see daddy” and I will tell her that I can’t take her to see daddy that only God can. So sometimes they talk about him, but whenever they hear his voice when I play his music, they always know that its his voice, and they always see pictures of him around the house. That’s one thing I know that I will always do for my children-make sure that hey remember what he looks and sounds like. I guess because of their age, it was easier for me to make them relax. Maybe when they get older, I would have to start explaining the concept of death to them.

All of these must be a very heavy burden for you at your age and when Jaiye died: how did you cope with responsibilities that used to be his to deal with?

Hmm! first of all, I wouldn’t say I’ve coped, just that I’m surviving. But the thing is, it’s God that has helped me because, by the time that my husband died, I remember that I clearly had N8,000 in my account. You see, prior to what happened, I’d travelled and Jaiye had also gone to South Africa to put finishing touches to his album. His album cost us a lot. Studios in South Africa are expensive, and because of his size, he could only fly first class, and then hotel and accommodation had to be taken care of. Before he left at that time, he had invested some money into one project he was supposed to be doing in Abuja. So we both had to put all our funds together for that last trip. So by the time I came back from London and he came back from south Africa, he was telling me that the business he had invested into in Abuja, that they would pay him back the following week, so that we’d have enough money to pay the bills we owed. It was whilst we were waiting for that money that he now died.

 

Did that money ever come?

Well, you know how Nigeria is, it never came, and I really don’t know what happened to it. At that point, if not for people that really had human sympathy, I don’t know what I would have done, God just sent people that I wasn’t even close to, who gave me money, foodstuff and prayed with me. So I was able to eat, to feed my children, who were now able to go to the same school. The only thing is that I wasn’t able to pay salaries. So I spoke to the staff that used to work for us before, when the band was still called SYNERGY, and the domestic staff, and I said to them, this is the situation, I don’t have anything, so anybody that wants to leave now, I wouldn’t be angry, because I know that I can’t afford to keep you. But surprisingly they all stayed back, that they were not going anywhere, and that they want to see it through with me. They felt that the only thing that we could do to make Jaiye happy wherever he is was to prove that he didn’t teach us all that he did in vain. And then little by little, people began to remember us and give us a chance.

 

How did you deal with all of the bad press that followed you after Jaiye’s death, especially as you were mourning him at the time?

This is probably the first time that I’m going to say this. Then, I used to describe myself as a walking corpse, because I was so dead. I could not sleep for over 4 months. My room was upstairs, but I could not sleep there, I’d sleep in the living room. I’d take my bath, come to the living room, eat there and change there. I couldn’t sleep or relax. It was so bad because I had to put up this face, so that the children don’t get worried, because they are very sensitive. I had to act a lot, because when I even stopped people from coming to the house with all these magazines, the phone calls wouldn’t stop. People will call and say, “Stella you are on the cover of this paper and they’re saying this and that about you”. So after a while, I just stopped touching my phone because I was afraid, I didn’t want to hear, “Stella, you have done this or that” as was reported. And I would wonder, “When did I do all these things they are saying about me, because I’ve been in this house”. During all of the mourning period, at that time, I didn’t even know how people would see me if I come out. Widowhood is not something you train for or you go to school and they would tell you that after your period of mourning, this is how you should behave or this is what you should say. It is something that hits you. It’s you, yourself and yourself. I didn’t know when to come out, when to start working again. I didn’t know how people would view me, because I knew that I was inside the house when all those bad stuff were being written about me. I nearly ran mad at that time. That was when I ran to the church, a place called Selab in Lekki. I was there everyday for one month praying, asking God to just deliver me. Because I said, it is not possible that I’ve just lost my husband and it’s like the whole world is against me. I wondered what crime I had committed. Nobody prays to loose anybody, let alone the life partner that you’ve built a life with. The kind of things I was hearing about myself, I was thinking that maybe I’m the one who’s mad. At a point, I began doubting myself, I would now ask those that were living with me at the time whether I went anywhere on the day I wasn’t supposed to have, that they were not aware of. We were all together now, so where is all this coming from? At a point, my mother came and she just looked at me, knelt in front of me and said, if it takes her to die, she would make sure that I don’t give up, that the devil is a liar and that the enemy will fall, that they cannot kill me. She said to me, “Repeat after me, you shall not die, but live to proclaim the goodness of God”. So I began to repeat after her. It was so much for my family to bear, because people actually forget that when you do something like that, it’s just not me, I have a family. People don’t know them because they don’t talk, they don’t want people to know their names, and they don’t have time for publicity. So I began to think that a lot of people just think that I dropped from the sky, because I don’t mention my family, but they don’t like it. My father was very pained. He said to me that the thing that pained him the most was that he loved Jaiye so much. Jaiye was the only one that could tell my father to dress up, that he was taking him out tonight, and my father would agree. My father is in his 70s, and you want to take him out at night. And I wasn’t even aware he did that. My father loved him so much, that’s the only thing that is making him keep quiet, out of respect for him. He’d tell me, “Don’t give up, we are behind you”. It got to a point that he said to me, “pack your things and come to Asaba, we’ll take care of you and the children, until you get yourself back”. A lot of people offered to take me away from here.

 

What was it about staying in the home that you shared with Jaiye that made you still stay there?

It was something that we used to talk about, especially when we got married. He used to say that one of the things he loved about me was one, I was very stubborn and that I was very independent minded. Because when he met me I was already working. I was living in a boys quarters with 6 others. We would trek from Yaba to where I was working. But he said to me that he knows that I am a fighter. He used to always say to me that “Look, even if I travel for 6 months, and I don’t leave 10 kobo for you, I know that you can run this house, so what is your problem?” because I would usually ask him that “Jaiye, I want to do my hair”, and he would say, “look at you, big girl like you, I know you have money and you can do it yourself”, and I would say “no, don’t go and be saying things like that, that you are going away for 6 months, to and do what? anywhere you are going, we will follow you”. You know because he had so much confidence in me, and really, sometimes, he’ll just say, “Stella, I know you can do it, I don’t need to talk too much, I need to go to South Africa”. And I would do it and he would come back and say, “that’s my girl, my Shorty!”, that’s what he used to call me.

I know that wherever he is, he would not want me to run, because he always said to people, “don’t run away from your problems, because they will follow you, face it and deal with it, if you can come out of it, then you are a strong person”. And I said, “Okay, I am not going anywhere”. When your grandmother tells you that the prayer that works is the one a person does when they go naked, we used to laugh about it, but I did it. I said “God, look at my hand. I don’t deserve this kind of thing, if the way I’m being treated is right, let your will be done, but if it is not, father, I put it into your hand”. But one thing I will never do is to curse anybody, because once you do that, God will not answer your own. And with my Bible in the middle of the night, I would strip naked and cry unto God, that this is how he created me and he has given me children, so he should provide for me and let me not beg. And whatever thing anybody has against me, “if my hands are clean and I’m innocent, father deal with it the way you want to”, and I left it at that. I’m still trying. Now the company is coming back, we’ve registered a new name.

 

Published on Nigerians in America courtesy City People

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142 comments

marigold anne mettle March 15, 2011 - 12:55 pm

In this world its not every body that would love you sis.somebody will just smile with you but within that person(wicked mind).the lord who created u by his own image will never ever forsake you in ur life,he will surely see u through all ur difficulties and will always deliver u from the wicked.SIS CHEER UP COS HE IS THE GIVER AND AS WELL AS THE TAKER SO IN EVERYTHING WE GIVE THANX.I LIKE UR FAITH SIS,KEEP IT UP. MARIGOLD FROM GHANA*****

marigold anne mettle March 15, 2011 - 12:45 pm

big sis i really love u sooo much to the extent dat, when am watching a movie and ur not in that i wont watch it!!!!!!!

All i would say to u is,sis still have faith in the lord as his word says touch not my anointed ones and do them no harm.And you would n can do all things through christ who strengthens you sis.stay bless with ur loving kids.

Ola JC November 18, 2010 - 12:25 pm

well after reading all the articles/interview and comment….i would like to thank GOD for your life and the life of your late husband. you see GOD knows why things happen and HE sees the future. continue to be strong in the LORD. As for those your friends that stood by you (kate etc) the LORD will reward them in JESUS name. you see i dont want to say anything about your in-law, because even if u have done anything wrong to them, i think that during those difficult period they should forget all that and still stay by you. however forgive them. i knw it can be difficult but ask GOD to help u. i love you so very much. ola jc

Ola JC November 18, 2010 - 11:52 am

saying that she is part of their family will make them feel important. her children is part their family not her. WHO THEM BE……Fire born bad people. Bad belle. she will make it. in JESUS NAME.

Ola JC November 18, 2010 - 11:46 am

very beautiful advice…..GOD bless u sis Faith, in fact i just saw this inteview and couldnt help my tears from rolling down.

Carol October 8, 2010 - 11:48 am

The bible says that in Psalms 68:5 “A father of the fatherless, and a judge of the widows, is God in his holy habitation” God knows what a widow goes through and thats why He is the Husband and the judge to the widows. No woman knows what a widow goes through untill the day she becomes one. people and even relatives condemn widows instead of caring for them. But God is their judge.

Topsy August 10, 2010 - 2:16 am

Good interview, but the story should’ve been balanced by an equally lengthy interview with one of the in-laws. Because I know for a fact that the Aboderins are enlightened, well-educated and even more well off than their late brother, so why would they victimise the widow or simply dislike her for no apparent reason?? Ater all, one of them is married to an Igbo man, and there are no problems there. In short, I wouldn’t be quick to judge them without a fair hearing, if I were you people. Over to you, Susan.

daina zeky July 6, 2010 - 12:38 pm

is it true that if you get a man who loves you unconditionally then the price will be hatred from the in laws?stella you should live your life and stop caring about people who have nothing better to do with their time.jaiye loved you so much and you should pay back by taking good care of his girls.you will be blessed and keep being strong….

Khuma May 7, 2010 - 10:07 am

It is very sad what us women have to go through, Stella is a strong woman and she will get there one day at a time. Life is not a fairytale but the challenge just teaches us to strive to be our best. God is Great in all aspects!

Mrs cheris January 3, 2010 - 5:44 pm

Stella u are blessed and I know God is in control,keep looking unto God and not on any man.I pray God to continue to bless u,and continue to give u the strength u need to carry on.please take very good care of yourself and remain blessed.God is in ur case.happy new year .love,ur biggest fan(a mother of three)

betty shalman December 31, 2009 - 3:25 pm

i am a great fan of yours aunty stella all i have to tell u is be happy in this moments bcoz they r stepping stones to a brighter future and no that all these negativities happens bcoz God wants to make a positive sign in yr life remember two negative sign make up a positive sign.

edith June 17, 2009 - 1:46 pm

hi stella its really a blessing to read your interview i really feel sorry but i know everything happens for a reason and i know God is always on your side if you seek his face and put everything under his control.i like your personality,i really admire you.

tessy June 1, 2009 - 3:12 am

like yr courage gal, move on God’s on yr side. with God you are everything, so dont be despised.

shade March 3, 2009 - 8:05 pm

whao!what a story……

it is a very touchy interview. Stella, you got to keep the winning attitude and keep the positive emotions alive. you just have to be strong for your 2 kids. let them say….. whatever…….. Don’t even give it a second thought. Anybody can say whatever, you can’t stop them. you need to adjust and adapt. You are a winner and God is on your side.

abisola February 20, 2009 - 11:03 am

stella d lord is your strenghth,he will not forsake u.God is always by the side of the widow.i love you.

jackie January 18, 2009 - 5:49 pm

stella may the good lord continue to srengthen you.we love you enen though we’ve never met,we do watch yo movies a lot on sky tv chanel333.

Chaka/US of A December 5, 2008 - 6:30 pm

It’s Decemebr 2008 and though I knew about Jaide, I’m just reading this article for the first time. All I can say is – Stella, God loves you and sees everything you had gone through. He is right there with you. Remember that always and forever. Keep your head up girl. I love you.

lovy/ USA October 7, 2008 - 12:24 am

my dear sister, i just finished reading your long tale with tears in my eyes and i fell really devastated because i can’t believe that poeple can be this creul to their own sisters even when children are involved.

i feel really bad now so all i will tell you is that, always put God in prayers and he will surely see you through despites all odds.

take heart and move on.

Jackie September 23, 2008 - 8:07 am

sweetheart, God is with you and he will never leave you nor forsake you, you are truly a living testimony of how God protects…You and your daughters will make it, the people of this world may let you down but God never fails, Your family will always remain in my prayers, live strong and declare the goodness of the lord.

alice September 3, 2008 - 5:17 pm

Oh ma God. i was really touched after reading all these. People who are not close to her now really gets to know what shes been going through.

Oh Stella, at ur young age——-widowed, left all alone to take care of the children. Dont worry all these times were just trying times and by Gods grace and mercy u have survived it and u will still survive more to come. GOD NOR DEY LEAVE HIN CHILDREN NA. Abeg make u do ur work, take care of ur children coz they are the greatest assets one can have ohhhhh.

Mind ur buziness nd nor dey listen to wetin pipl dey talk—–they alwayz have sth to say, —good or bad

Anyways, me love ur movies and ur roles. u be one of ma best Five ohh-lol

May the grace of God be with yu

Much love from a lovely and big fan…

Mimi August 26, 2008 - 10:33 am

Hello Stella i was touched so much after i read this publication. I prophecy upon ur life today that those that laughed at u and turned their backs on you shall come back and ask for forgiveness. May the lord strengthen you.

Rhonda August 8, 2008 - 5:41 pm

Hi Stella,

I am so sorry for you loss. May God continue to provide you with the strength to keep on keeping on. Take good care of you girls and keep you head high. You are an annointed sista, so stay blessed!

Flora August 6, 2008 - 11:27 pm

I was really touched. It is so painful to read all this. All i’m asking God right now is to give her the strengh, to be the solid rock on which she’ll stand, and to see her through everything. May she finds in the Lord all the love and affection she is lacking of. Dear Stella the banner of the Lord Jesus Christ is LOVE don’t ever forget that. He is the husband to the widows and He will help you raise the beautiful girls He himself has sent on this earth through you. Stay blessed.

Stella July 11, 2008 - 12:45 am

Stella Darl, i salute ur courage and strength… i want u to know dat there is still a God somewhere dt is watching.. At his due time everything will fit into place. take this as a temporary thing. Believe in God and urself u’l surely pull thru this. Take good k of urself and the gals.

Omotayo Salaudeen July 4, 2008 - 8:22 am

Hmn dearest, I really feel for you because I know wot it is to lose someone you very close to you.Truly I appreciate your courage.I am a yoruba woman, married with a kid.Many times i feel anything can happen anytime, den comes d question au do i intend to face it and everytime i answer myself and say “I will accept it since I do not av power to change it, work hard an take care of my child”.Growing up my mother used to sing to me”omolayinke tori omo ni mo se n sise, ayinke”.meaning:dat she is working bcos of her child.

Life must go on, u need to continue to work vey hard for your girls,you should practically live for them.They must become what u want them to be, that way u will feel fufilled,ur husband will smile and say to u”shorty well done”

Forget about his family.Assume u got pregnant and Jaiye was not even able to take you to meet his family, won’t you take care of d child?try your best to unite with dem, if it works fine but better than not trying at all at least for the sake of your girls against the story they will be told in the nearest future.

The press: they need money for biz to move on, so they must ell a story.Remember dat wen u do it rit, it is d same press. So just let dem be,ignore them and leave your life normally like the true Stella.

Remember that NOBODY has the right to make you feel unhappy without your consent.Do anything that will make you happy.

Above all I want you to be closer to God,be His right hand baby bcos only Him can do it right for you.Trust in Him only.

God will be your strenght,it’s just a matter of time.

I love you.

Omotayo Salaudeen

Molly June 12, 2008 - 1:14 pm

Hi Stell, heard ’bout ur loss but was so grieved n couldn’t think of writing. I’m amazed and inspired at ur courage n intelligence, actually baffled at how quickly u rose to ur feet. Knew u as a beautiful n life-giving actress; but hardly knew the highly empowered and enterprising person of a woman u are. I’m proud of u as the things I feared most have now been cleared by the article: Praise the Lord Almighty.

I am a Cameroonian lady (based in Douala), just about your age, who has always loved n admired u, and still does. Hugs to those sugarly spiced little girls. I love ’em so much (though I haven’t seen ’em), something tells me they’re sweet.

FANTA SISSOKO June 2, 2008 - 12:31 pm

My name fanta i am from mali i like u so much dont worry god will gorge

Pray for ur husdand always god will give u good persone

Xtin March 22, 2008 - 4:18 pm

We love you Stella but God loves you the most and in the best way and that’s why you have seen him in your life every single moment. Keep been you, we’ll always pray for you and all the best for you and for your lovely angels.

Debbie March 10, 2008 - 2:39 pm

wow, i have truly missed a whole lot in this Couby (Naija) Stella, do you still remember Debbie?

Sylvia Nina February 21, 2008 - 10:27 am

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiii Stella im one of ua fans but thanx 4 being frank n’ honest. Actually i was reading some of the qns being asked n’ i felt they wdn’t have asked u. BUT ma Dear Stella LIFE STILL GOES ON even if JAY is gone. Always remember dat LIFE IS NEVER ONE SWEET SONG. We still love u we ua fans n’ will continue to love u. Ma dear if one person doesnt like u dont be stressed be ua self coz ua kids will grow n’ become some one. Always put God first in ua daily menu. Psalms 140 and cast all ua enemies by naming them. Im A Ugandan and a Big tym Fan of uas Stella.

Ayo Falekulo January 13, 2008 - 6:40 am

This is a very insightful interview. Stella thanks for your frank honesty. I pray that the rift in the family will heal with time and wish you the very best. Now the film “Widow” makes even deeper sense to me.

TOMI January 3, 2008 - 5:31 pm

hey stella, putting myself in your shoes i really feel pity for you but let somthing always ring in your mind that where ther is nobody God is always there.May God help you in upbringing your little kids and always try to remain rigid and be your self.MY BIGGESt FAN YOU ARE

annoymous December 26, 2007 - 1:48 pm

Stella, may God continue to be your strength. I pray your late husbands family comes to grip with the fact that you are a good person and get close to the girls if not for anything

victoria December 20, 2007 - 6:04 am

Stella dear I am so sorry to hear that you went through all that but have it in mind that The Good Lord is your strenght and He shall never forsake you. You are a good actress and very beautiful. Keep trusting in God for he is the only one that make all things right. Take care my dear . It is well.

charity December 3, 2007 - 7:45 am

you guys are just wonerful am praying for stella tell her to keep faith God is with her. you will conquer it all,take care and be strong as you always teach me in your movies

VICTORIA ANSONG November 12, 2007 - 1:17 pm

My dear u are indeed a blessed lady and mind u God will never let u down. U shall never be find wanting for u will be forever elevated in all u do

Iyke November 2, 2007 - 8:38 am

While reading this article I was just trying to visualize it as if am watching a movie what Stella Damsus has gone through.It must have really been tough.I felt sorry for her.Anyway on the problem with the husband family I thinK its like an african mentality or will Isaw tradition and the cause is illitracy am not directing this to anybody in particular,I hope one day all this shit will be over.You are a star my sister just keep doing your thing and with help of God and we you fans remembering you in prayer you will make it in Jesus Name. in case of any comments on corrections dont hesitate to get me on sheggs20032000@yahoo.com

Seyi Ayeni September 13, 2007 - 12:33 am

am happy to read an interview frm stella finally and knwin she has being thru so much breaks my heart,i reali do admre u stella,if i cld turn hands the hands of time for u and Jaiye i will but God knws best..4rm u i av learnt the biggest lesson in life and i intend on livin by it..i will continue to pray for u and ur little angels and i pray God will give u a man dat will luv u,not necessarily replace Jaiye cos i dnt want dat but to share dat special part in ur hrt and make u find complete happiness again..i hope u get this..i love u but God loves u more..stay blessed

dave September 7, 2007 - 5:37 am

keeep ur head up babes god is with u..

tayothompson August 2, 2007 - 2:12 pm

hi stella, ione of ur fans based in the uk i really apperciate ur work and think your fab, God is with u and will asee u through all ur storms dont 4get u go through them ,but they will not overcome u.all this helps you be a better person and closer to ur God,but remember u have won the battle.luy ya and will like to meet you one of thses days.

bimbo July 20, 2007 - 7:23 pm

stella, it is well with you and all yours [children and family]. you are a woman of great honour, i admire you and my heart goes out to you. may your adorable hubby continue to rest in peace till you meet to part no more. you are covered by the blood of Jesus! hold tight and stay alive, darl! love u, babe. welldone city people, brilliant job, susan!

Engr Oluseyi Adewoye July 16, 2007 - 12:02 pm

I know Stella is beautiful but to know that she's this intelligent is what I never imagined. She's a woman of my dream

mary July 14, 2007 - 11:46 am

The grammar and composition Could have done with proper massaging for an international audience.

damola July 11, 2007 - 9:45 pm

Stella,i was touched by this interview,u most have spoken from your heart of heart,i most confess that i'm triped by the way you have handled this issue.I really do hope and pray that someday,sonner than you expect,that you and your late husband's family would resolve your differences.Let the past stay behind you,find a place in your heart to love them.Remain strong.

toyin June 18, 2007 - 6:35 am

first of all,i want to say to stella,sorry 4 ur loss,jaiye's p.a was a close friend of my family so we got a 1st hand detail of how hard everything was 4 u,i think u should know dat such is life,Jehovah God be with u and bless all of ur endeavours.

Krissy June 8, 2007 - 4:08 am

whoa! this interview is really something,had no idea she went thru all these.Some in-laws can be wicked,Stella hold ur head high,God will see you thru all ur sorrows,much love!

ije May 31, 2007 - 4:15 pm

My heart goes out to Stella. The pain and struggle of not having a united family to support her in her time of grief must be immense. I thank God that she did have some people to lean on when she needed them. The Nigerian view of a wife as an outsider to the family continues to rile me. It breaks the hearts and hopes of the widows and fatherless children left behind. Perhaps if our legal system took a stronger stand on this issue, assigning full rights of authority and ownership over a deceased man's affairs and estate, then we would have fewer cases of disposession and unecessary intrusions from in-laws. To Stella, I say keep your strength and spirits up and keep smiling from you heart. God cares and I wish you and your daughters the very best.

The article is most welcome. Thanks to city people for bringing it to us. On quality, I believe Susan could have written the article better. Stella speaks much better grammar than the written words.

Sara May 31, 2007 - 1:26 pm

Great interview. Stella, I admire your honesty and the maturity you displayed in handling the issue of the anniversary with your in-laws. God knows few of us would have been as mature. My advice is this: Move On! You have so much going for you, yuou dont need to be held back by the smallness and pettiness of other people. IT IS WELL WITH YOU AND YOURS!

Yinka Aboderin May 22, 2007 - 4:58 pm

God will continue to bless you and the Kids, whatever the problems you're having with your in-laws, God will give you the grace to overcome it. stay bless.

IJEOMA March 16, 2007 - 8:08 am

Dear stella,

is a pity things had to be like this.take heart,that is what we see in this world.is a price everybody has to pay one day.life is full of challenges.u taste the bitter side of it and the sweet side of it.such is life. i feel for u.accept my sympathy.bye ij

yinka March 11, 2007 - 4:32 am

you are a rare gem worthy of emulation. u r cherished so much

Helen February 26, 2007 - 9:14 am

Hi Stella, i am writing from Cameroon. I really feel sorry for all you have had to put up with right from the start. it's a wonder how some families thing they are high and mighty. I just pray God gives you a long life and good health to be able to bring up your children. Don't bother about the silly gossips, people will always talk and when they talk just know it's God's way of telling you you are a Star. Take good care of the kids for us and your husband. I can only imagine what it means to be a widow at your age.God's richest Blessings in all your endeavours

marjorie February 25, 2007 - 8:55 am

Stella is a strong woman and i believe she will make it through against all odds.I'm a big fun of her and i really feel sorry 4 her but i know everything is God's plan

Bridget Ohare February 24, 2007 - 6:22 pm

Stella've wish 4 a moment l'ke dis and GOD's bless dis day…'&'ve been dyin to get in touch wiv u..since i long heard abt yr husband's death & felt l'ke She is too young to be a widow 've ask daddy GOD why and i knew his ans was Bridget daughter tin happened 4 a reason.!!!nt withstanding when u came to de Irish world i was yes i will finally get to c u!!bt all to no avail…i wish den i could c,and get to talk wiv u.well???? I felt being in the limelight the best ting was 4 u to relocate,4'u!'ve done extremely well as a mother for cant imagine going thru all that you went thru! May Daddy God continue to be wiv 4 u…!!.coz dac's wht i ask of him 4 u..,is grace , mercy,peace and a sound health 4 both u and de Kids so take very gud care of yrself and de Kids which're de most important ting to deal wiv 4 nw…my luv to u all best regard to yr mum & dad love once arnd u..

u're a great woman. i l'ke ur person, movies and always wish to c or hart wiv u',some days i leave and luv u all

Esther February 18, 2007 - 8:52 pm

I have always loved you stella. I hope you get this message. You are an icon, a strong role model that portray woman in high status. i have always been your fan, engagement night. Be strong, never allow what people say about you pull you down. Ignore them, show love, humility, be strong in God and you will see how he will repay you back. In short, I adore you, keep your sparkling spirit up with yourself, friends, family and children. Your life and that of your children will be in testimony in Jesus name, never give in to pressures, don't give up! You are cherished, luv from esther.

Pls, refer this message to Stella, it's from my heart to her. Thank you.

Mariam February 18, 2007 - 5:53 pm

Stella please know that you are bless, and you are wonderful.God bless you and your children.

Mariam from The Netherlands please send me an email it will do me good.

toya February 8, 2007 - 6:59 pm

Hi. i am stella's cousin from America. i would love to get into contact with her. does she have any contact info? it doesn't have to be direct. mine is kionex@hotmail.com

Kini Merabel February 7, 2007 - 4:26 am

Aunty Stella, Just lift your hands up and say that you will make it because your life and that of your kids are in the Blessed Hands of JESUS.

Your fan in Cameroon

kafayat motunrayo adeniyi February 5, 2007 - 1:50 pm

don´t worry my dear,move forward and the God is ur strength.he will never leave you nor forsake u.love u

DELPHINE February 3, 2007 - 11:05 am

TO ME STELLA IS REALLY A TOUGH WOMAN.IT ISN'T REALLY EASY BEEN A WIDOW IN SUCH A TENDER AGE.I REALLY FELT SORRY FOR HER.LET HER JUST COMMIT HERSELF TO THE ALMIGHTY GOD,FOR HE IS THE BEGINGING AND THE END OF EVERYTHING.THANKS AND BYE

Angel February 2, 2007 - 8:48 pm

Hi love, Christ Jesus is right inside you and your kids, Angels of God are all around you, the Holy Bible says, when you look around yourself, you will see the Lord Jesus. Just keep believing in God alone and he will continue to bless you and make a way for you in all you do. Just few things left for you to do for God. Trust, obey, have faith, pray and read your Bible everyday and everything will be fine with you in Jesus Name Amen I will keep prayers for you. Remain bless sister. just keep saying that the devil is always a liar.

DAMIANO January 21, 2007 - 8:45 am

she is in fact the best actress i have ever watch on screen. pls stella keep the ball rolling. i wish to commesurate with you over the untimely(to man) and Timely(to God) demise of your husband. take heart life continue.may his gentle soul rest in peace. i will be very greatfull should you mail me more and perhaps current information about an actress i so much admire.you are a model for most nigerian actresses that are out to show or display their nudity to the innocent on-lookers.decent contuming should be your watch word. cheers a million

Phebe January 16, 2007 - 6:10 am

I just felt like brousing today even thou i ve got an exam tomorrow, so i typed your full name into google and this page appeared and i decided to read since am one of your fans…its so good to read all this sincere details about you, how much dedicated you were and still are to your late husband even after he has passed away…i hope he went to meet the lord in glory and hope that at the end of life wen this world would come to an end the whole family would be re-united once again…i ll always pray fro you and the gurls…i love kids so soooo much, you cant imagine how much and reading this detail of your has built a string btw me and your gurls even thou i dont know them, i am going to ask you one favour, is it possible to meet and the kids sometime this year? at the moment am a medical student of the university of szeged, currently studying in hungary but i hope to retrn home sometime in the year and i want to meet your babies, tell them if you dont mind that the have a big anty friend…i am 22yrs old and a daughter of a well nown God fearing pastor…please email me at chyohany@yaho.com so we can talk more, and if you dont mind include your number and i will give ya a call…keep being strong and focused….

remember wat the bible says in proverbs…commit your ways into his (God) hands and he ll direct your path…and that of ur babies,,he ll neva let evil befall them, he ll keep them under his wings, u know how much God treasures them…stay blessed dear actress

looking forward to reading from you

anastasia serebour January 7, 2007 - 11:22 am

Stell, u're a great woman. i like ur movies and always want to see u in movies. u'll survive this moment of loneliness. alone in the world is to be alone with GOD. He is always around to make u happy.

ojay January 2, 2007 - 12:29 pm

Dear dear Stella, I couldnt help but scream when i heard about your husband's death & I was like: She is too young to be a widow and I felt that being in the limelight the best thing was to relocate with the kids because the press would definitely come after you. But because you have the grace of God, you have done extremely well for yourself & your kids. I am married with 2 kids & cant imagine going thru all that you went thru! May God continue to be with you and please find time to read John 5:28,29 and Revelation 21:4,5. Take care of you & the kids

Nneka Nwani December 28, 2006 - 6:43 am

Heyyy Girl… this is your schoolmate from Santa Maria… I'm here in the U.S Oh and I would like to congradulate you for doing soo well for yourself… Gurll when I 1st saw you in a movie I was like. OMG…. is that Stella? I am soo sorry about your loss. Remember one thing that God watches all and sees all and if ur late husbands family dont like you for no reason, judgement will pass I promise you and the wrong they've caused you will be made right… I would post my number in here but it's too much out into the public.. Sooo email me at zahra_fair@yahoo.com.. Oh by the way.. How is Susie???

St Kunle December 27, 2006 - 6:26 am

Stella, I really feel your pain and what you are going through now, with your daughters. I just got married and live pratically with my wife. Please, take care and God Be with You

Ifeanyi December 14, 2006 - 3:28 am

God bless u good & ur kids too.It is well with u guys in Jesus name.

Taiwo Oyaniyi December 4, 2006 - 1:13 pm

It's very certain dat man will be faced with all sorts of problems. What u experienced is not a new thing. There are lots of problems faced by the same women like u and if u keep trusting in God he is there to support u, stand by u and he'll see u overcoming all problems.Focus on ur children don't allow rumours get u down if not ur enemy will be happy seeing u down.Jesus is ur strenght.He will be there for u all the time.

gloria November 28, 2006 - 9:56 am

hmm! what a world. I don not know much about people mag. and their false info., allm I can say is may God continue to give Stella the strength, most especially, to be a good mother to her kids.

unknown USA November 21, 2006 - 10:48 pm

Could you help me forward this to Stella.

Stella thanks for being yourselve as always and for the honest answers. Clear conscience fears no accusation. I thank God for His Grace in your life. It is only the person that wear the shoe that knows where and how it hurts, but I am happy that you know the right place where your help comes from, THE ever present in time of need, THE Best Husband for the widow and Best father to the fatherlss, THE only one that will never fail you when every other person fail, THE only one that will meet your family's need without any string attached, THE only dependable one The ALMIGHTY GOD, our LORD JESUS CHRIST. Never stop looking up always, not only at the cross roads,also before taking the simplest dicision about your family. You know once He give you His go ahead signature, the resulting confidence can carry you to any level just because He put His name on the line by approving the move your taking. In those moves when huddles come (which will always come) you will have the boldness to remind Him "Papa" remenmber your name is on the line, You have to defend Your name. All those good toughts you have for your kids, as the best Father, He will taken them to levels beyound your imagination as long as you are holding Him on His robe always to defend His name in their lives and let Him know you are not letting Him go untill you get an answer for each situation. He is forever faithfull. I am happy you know Him. Even the situation with your in-laws remember He is PRINCE OF PEACE. I am encouraging you to show the difference. Call Him into it with a peaceful and forgiving heart He will melt the friction away. Remember He encourage us to live in peace with all men as much as possble. Strif is one of the biggest barier from reaching where God want us to be. Forgive. Many things were thought and said about JESUS how much more about you, but He forgave. He want us to be like Him. He is Unchangable God, you have the right key to unluck every unluckable doors' please I beg you, don't be careless with it. Remain blessed.

Unknown from USA 11/21/2006

egwuonwu ann chika November 16, 2006 - 9:18 am

Believe in God 4 he is the only that can wipe away your tears.he said in the bible that he is the husband of the widow,just trust in him and he will never let you down.I LOVE YOU

ope November 16, 2006 - 9:16 am

i know it is very had 4 u 2 get over this,but life will definitely go on.just keep ur head up and be focused.whatever decision u make consider ur children cos dey r d real family u have.takia of urself God bless u and ur familychildren

oluwatosin November 15, 2006 - 10:23 am

stella,u ar a unique being,take heart.God wil b der for u at all times.he loves u and ur children.i like ur person.it is well.

Racheal November 11, 2006 - 3:59 pm

Wow, this article has absolutely changed my view of stella, since her husband died. It is quite sad to know that rivaries of this nature still occur between wives and their in-laws in nigeria, if this were a movie i would say that his family killed him, rather than have him be happy with a woman they hate. All thesame, i know that God will see her and her children through, and the Bible says that young widows can re-marry so what is anybody's business if she dates, marrys or is seen with anyone in town? I am personally praying that everything she touches will prosper, and i know that we have not seen the last of her.

ayo November 10, 2006 - 8:25 am

hi stella am so sorry about your ur husband death god knows why all this happend i just want u to be srong am one of your biggest fan i love u take heart u can reach on this number 00931626924878 if u need anything ayo from holland

FAITH October 27, 2006 - 10:12 am

Hi Stella, my name is Faith and am Zambian. I luv watching Nig. movies especially where u r featuring,,,and i luv most yo part in 'REAL LOVE' ant in 'BRIDES MAID' u r just what u r i mean a person who does what she feels is right to save others and herself. About yo what u went thru. am so sorry i know how u feel. About me am 26yrs old with one child. i wud b happy if u cud write back. Stay well and very blessed.

your fan

Fola October 25, 2006 - 4:34 pm

Stella, the joy of the Lord will continue to be your strength. Unfortunately it is when things like this happen that you know who loves and cares for you. You have a good head. Continue to put GOD first in all that you do and HE will direct your paths.

dammie October 25, 2006 - 2:38 pm

it wuz a good and nice articles. stella with God on ur side, nobody came do anything and wat i want the aboderins 2 knw s dat, we r all goin 2 die,and wether dy like it or nt she s still part of their family

Afua Brefo October 12, 2006 - 1:30 am

i think stella has said it all and it makes so much sense.she is a strong woman and she will make it far.

mrs rebecca opare October 11, 2006 - 11:50 am

hi stella, iam happy for your courageous. be bold and take what belongs to you. although loosing your husband is painful, but i assure you that he is resting in the bossom of our lord so i want you to be courageous and the lord will be with you as he was with moses. take the word of God and be with your children. i would like to be of help if any thing. contact me on 0243219153 or agyemanrebecca@yahoo.com. God be with you.

faith October 11, 2006 - 7:09 am

Hi stella, one thing i want you to know is that our god is a miracle god, he has never failed, he will never fail and he is ever faithful to his words. He is the husband of the widows, the father of the fatherless. I know it is not an easy thing. But i will like you to always quote these confessions whenever fear begins to rise 'i can do all things through christ that strengthens me', 'greater is he that is in me than he that is in the world'. Beloved be strong in the lord and in the power of his mind. God has already prepared you before all that happened,so sister, look up to him alone because he is the author and finisher of your faith. Man wil fail you and they have done, even your husband failed you because he could not fulfill his promises to always be there for you. Even you failed your self when you began to exercise fear and confussions. All this is to tell you that we as human are inperfect. So the summary of my exhaltation to you is that turn totally to the one and only, the ever living, the ever present help in times of trouble. And that is jehovah the man of war. Live right, abstain from sin. Remarry if the urge comes, you are biblically entitle as long as it is prayerfully done. It is better than to fall into sin of adultery. Care not about what inperfect human says. And you know what, if your way is pleasing to god, he will cause all your enemies to be at peace with you. It is well with all that concerns you and your wonderful kids in jesus name. Amen. Faith from london. 07960570916. Pls get in touch i want to be your friend xxx

CHARITY October 7, 2006 - 7:04 pm

Stella, my heart goes for you my darling, just move on and look after your children. Have fun and remarry if the right and genuine bloke come knocking on your door. God bless you and remain blessed.

Claudette ( gtanna) September 29, 2006 - 4:29 pm

Stella my dear God is with you he will guide you all the way through to glory and the Angels will always be around your beautiful girls.Peace i leave with you and my peace i give you i will always love you

Kenny September 27, 2006 - 5:35 pm

I pray that God almight will be with you and he will alway make away. You and your childrens will not lack anygood things in life, he will bless your bread and your water.

Dr angela September 8, 2006 - 9:04 am

i lov u stella . and will like to know u . pls email me soon . am sorry about the death of ure husband

Brenda K September 4, 2006 - 4:29 am

This interview is really touching.i love Stella so much and it hurts to hear she's going through so much. Whatever it is, God will see you thru. You will look back and say WOW. Your business is now your God, LIfe, Children and yourself…no one else. By the way I would like to get in touch with her so whoever has her email address pliz send it to my mail box. Thanx

lanre August 30, 2006 - 7:07 am

sorry about ur lost, may his gently soul rest in peace

Blossom August 29, 2006 - 8:03 pm

Sweety, just remember that in God you live, move and have ur being…

Jaiye is Happy and wants you to be to, so just hang on…

Bless u

Richard August 18, 2006 - 4:13 pm

Stella Damasus is by far my favourite actress out of the whole lot and she is insanely talented,, we all know that… It is only natural for me to be drawn towards her ut more than anything she was very true, which is a very rare qualty from all these actors and actresses..Anyway I think its high time she sued these hopeless rumour mongers because her image is very important and this image is very important as it will be in history much later in life,, she needs to have a good record at least for her children..Anyway Stella should pick the bits and pieces of her life now and move on.

vic August 18, 2006 - 12:47 pm

I feel such sorrow for Stella.Never knew she went through so much and still stayed strong inspite of it all.

May she always find the strength and comfort she need sfrom God always.

The media should be careful about what they write and not just to shoot up sales,its not fair on anyone to have lies written about them-star or not

BCN ROMEO August 12, 2006 - 11:42 am

Hey Stella,

nothing much to say but just to say hi and to ask u a little favor.

Please i want u to help me ask any of these producers if i can take part in any of the film. i will be very greatfull if u do that and it came out positive i will owe u alot of gratitude.

Here is my phone number 002377162795.

i am in Cameroon but immediately u do that please dont hesitate to call me or just bip and i will call.

Please dont neglet this cuz it will mean a lot to me. and if only u will use theat Godly heart to do this for me as if u are doing it in one of ur relative then God will surfely reward u.

Bye for now my address is bcn_romeo4real@yahoo.com u can write me and let me know the fit back. bye for now and have a nice time with ur kid and ur life.

Be a good girl and dont let pride over take u.

U CAN TREMENDUSLY GOOD. NOT A FLATTER BUT A STATEMENT OF FACT.

BYE

Ms O. July 30, 2006 - 11:04 am

Stella, you have been through hell and back but your Lord who you serve will never leave you on your own.

My penny's worth advice is that whatever you can do to make things work out between yourself and your inlaws – such as attending an anniversary (for the sake of the kids and for Jaiye's sake), pls do. You can carry with your life the way your choose to but if once or twice a year, you have to go to your in-laws affairs, no matter how painful or inconvenient, pls do. I'm not asking you to compromise your happiness but where possible, embrace peace and hold no grudge!. You owe yourself this as a Christian and as a mum. God bless you.

For the lady/man who lost their brother in an auto accident in Florida, my condolences to them. I read about it in England and 'till this day, it bears heavily on my mind 'cause a whole family was almost wiped out (there were two families involved).

adaobi2 July 24, 2006 - 1:59 pm

hi girl fridend i hear all happan to u, take heart such is life the reson why God allowed it to happan is to u to learn something and now u have achieve that. Glory be to god in heaven, nothing will happen to u and kids God is our strenght and strong tower.

oluchi July 13, 2006 - 10:50 am

i honestly felt stella'S pains when she lost Jaiye of blessed memory, i couldn't understand how she was going to move on. thank GOD she is fine now. i love u stella n GOD will bring a good husband and father to you and angelica isabel respectively. shake off the gloom girl.

omolayo July 6, 2006 - 2:06 pm

Only if you have lost a loved one will you be able to truley understand how Stella felt with the death of her husband.Life can be so very unfair atimes when it gives death the victory of taking a loved one.I feel for you darling Stella cause you are too beutiful to have gone through all this,but alas…thats life.Thats just the pains that comes with being too beutiful,you put people on the edge and the become resentive and suspicious of your moves there after.Just keep your head up baby girl and pray your daughters marry husbands who will be a father the never grew up to know well.I love you girl,Keep it up, grow stronger and show them that without the Aboderins money your girls can make it.All the best in all your endervous and be prayerful too.Always pray for Jaiye that he finds peace with is Creator.

nwakaego July 1, 2006 - 11:33 am

the interview is very touching ur one of a kind stella not many african women can survive this especially when she has built her world around her husband.be strong and i tell u, u will triumph.cheers

nwakaego July 1, 2006 - 11:22 am

hello sda am one of ur bigest fan and i love the way u have been reacting to things even when it seems almost impossible.i just pray that God almighty will keep u and give u long lenght of days and strenght to cater 4 ur children. let u faith always be strong and know that he has seen u thru. u are truly a strong african woman.cheers

Funto Temiye June 28, 2006 - 9:09 am

Dear Stella,i am sorry for the death of your husband.May God be with you and your children AMEN.I would like to be an actress like you.Though i am still young but i will like to act because i always want to heart because my heart tells me to do so.Please iwant you to accept me in any of your movies.My email address is fnttmy@yahoo.com and my phone number is 017941207.God bless you and your children AMEN

Stella Alpha June 27, 2006 - 3:31 pm

it me again stella i just want to tell that i like the way u act and the song u have sang i hope i will become someone like u because i like singing too and reading,and i hope i see u one day.stella alpha 15years old in grade ten,and have a poor family.of u want to talk to me call (001)-(614)-987-5594

Stella Alpha June 27, 2006 - 3:22 pm

Hi Stella, how are u doing now i hope u are fine.i know that it's not easy to loss your husband and i fill sorry for you. may the Lord help u and your two daughter.And may the Lord help u on your acting career and your music.MAY THE LORD HELP U ANYWHERE U ARE AND YOUR CHILDREN.

fadekemi June 12, 2006 - 1:22 pm

GOD in heaven knows dt i love stella damasus aboderin wiv all my heart.i have never believed all d rumours dey carried about her.am so happy dt her trust is in GOD.atleast i know GOD can never fail her.all i can say 2 those treating her bad is VENGANCE IS D LORDS.I LUV U SDA.GOD bless u.

ami tejan-cole June 9, 2006 - 6:14 pm

i think this article is the best because it clears the air about all the rumours that has been going on about my girl Stella. I thank you for this article.

BINTA O. BAJEH May 31, 2006 - 10:35 am

Stella has been someone i admired, someone i've always look forward to met in person. Shes got guts. If after all this troubles she has been able to keep afloat, then i've got a role model. My wish and prayer is for god to keep on guiding and protecting her from the wholfs called humans. You are loved – keep on the with the spirit. The lord knows the best for u.

Anonymous May 27, 2006 - 1:09 pm

I love Stella, and I think she really is a trooper, for doing this long interview.

shola May 15, 2006 - 11:40 am

GOOD JOD SDA U ARE A TRUE MOM AND KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK AND MAY GOD BE WITH U AND YOUR CHILDREN

ALWAYS LUV U

MONICA DAVIES April 27, 2006 - 11:59 am

Dearest Stella,

Thak you City News you have doen a great job. God bles you all. You should have come up with this long shince because of the negative things people might have been thinking of sister Stella. I hope this message gets to you. Please i would like to tell you that you should never give up as you have said that your husband knows that you can succeed in anything you want to do. know that your children needs you more than ever. I never thought for once that people can be so heartless to treat you in such a way even in the time of mourning at that painful time. Take heart and always keep praying God shall surely see you through. when i read your interview i can't held my tears back, it is so pathetic. I wish you the best in your present business. And your friends people like Katty are really friends in deed. Extend my love and apppreciation to Katty she also is one of my super star. God Guide and protect you.

love you always

Monica Davies

The Gambia

Judy April 26, 2006 - 4:08 am

U know what i feel sorry for those of us who find great joy from other people's sorrows. The unthinkable can also happen to us any moment from now. So please let's be careful the way we treat others. We are not aware what kind of trouble you are inviting from God coz we NEVER EVER treat someone God created from HIS IMAGE like trash, nomatter what.

Stella am one of your fans in Zim. U know what I really know how u feel coz i have bn there. It's normal to feel that way coz that's the healing process. Never ever wish anything bad to happen to those who say and think evil about you,instead pray that God have mercy upon their souls then relax and see what will happen. Long before you know it some of the people will come begging for your forgiveness coz God's ways are different from ours and no one will ever understand how HE operates.

The Will of God will Never Take you where the Grace of God will never Keep You. I salute you coz u are a Believer. One of these these days you will be able to remember your loved one with tears of Joy not Sorrow.

Any negativity just redirect it: WRONG ADDRESS,TRY JESUS. By just doing that you are declaring war between the Army of the Almighty and the enemy.

I wish you the best in all you do.

Patience April 24, 2006 - 1:22 pm

Hi SDA, U are a brave woman and am proud of u. Try and not mind those people who have nothing better to with themselves other than to gossip and spread false rumours about. Just try and ignore them, i know its difficult but try for ur sake and the sake of ur daugthers. All the evil doers are after is ur end but they have failed woefully, it is the end of themselves and their cohorts that they would see.

Girlfriend lift ur head up and smile again. The best is yet to come. I Love you, u are in my prayers and thoughts. I would Love to meet you girlfriend, am one of ur fans. I wish we could exchange details and get rob minds together. Take very good care of urself and the girls. I appreciate ur true friends too kate, bena and Sammie. It is during times like this that you know who truly are your friends. Treasure them because friends like them are hard to come by. Pls get in touch with me pretty pls.

Unwana April 23, 2006 - 6:47 pm

I had to take time out to read this article because back then when i was in Nigeria, i heard all the lies they told about Stella Damasus.. deep in me , i knew they were lies.. she's a very pretty woman and its obvious that there is bound to be jealousy.. People should leave her alone. Stella: Make the Lord your strong tower and he will direct your path.

Bravo!

olawale April 22, 2006 - 2:55 pm

Hi Stella.I just hope this message gets to you.I want to tell you that God is always in control.Though it seems dark now,Stella there is always light at the end of the tunnel.I want you now to make a re-think and visit your life in order to make the best out of it.As for your children,the Lord will comfort them and care for them as a father will care for his children.I hope to see them one day.Its well.You are and will remain an shining star.Im forever your fan and i will always stand the gap for you.Olawale

Rita April 21, 2006 - 1:28 pm

Stella Dear,

To say im happy for u is an understatment.i felt soooooooo bad when all efforts to speak to u on phone during ur most trying times failed.i asked Genevive whom i heard was ur friend,to greet u for me.i'm sure she did.I prayed earnestly for u and won't stop ever.My folks especially my mum felt soo bad and alwys prayed for u.

Know what Stella, all those who chose to torment u,have always been,will remain and always be a bunch of loosers.trust God on this.if they don't come to the foot of the cross and ask God for 4givness,this is my prayer for them "U WENT THRU URS AND CAME OUT STRONGER.THEY WILL ENCOUNTER WORSE SITUATIONS,FEEL THE PAINS U FELT,HAVE A TASTE OF THEIR OWN MEDCINE AND ONLY GOD WILL DECIDE IF THEY COME OUT OF IT OR NOT"

they fail to realise one can't build one's life with some one and then want to end it just like that.God!!!!!!!!!.

Stella,we re strongly behind u in every way and what's more?God and His heavenly host are SOLIDLY on ur side.TRUST ME ON THIS.

my number is 08055074415 should u decide to grant my request of being ur very close fan.plx,give me ur number.

My sweet regards to ur lovely angels Angelica and her sister(sorry in can't remember her name).Thry re destined for God's greatest.MARK MY WORDS

Cheers.

Anonymous April 20, 2006 - 11:16 am

The editor needs to check the spelling & grammer in certain places. But it seems like an honest, heart felt story. May God guide her.

Anonymous April 17, 2006 - 8:16 pm

stella, pls be strong. the LORD GOD ALMIGHTY is on ur side. make up with ur husbands people so u will have peace & rememba to pray without ceasing. take gud care of ur kids. this actually moved me to tears.

Damilola April 17, 2006 - 5:56 pm

Stella,I really feel ur pain.I pray dat God will take care of u and ur kids.He will be by ur side always and continue 2 bless u.U need all d strenght u can get so please think about ur kids and do what,s best 4 u and them.

Anonymous April 15, 2006 - 10:03 am

My Words of Encouragement to Stella.

I was going to say Poor Stella, but I thought otherwise because I admire her strength and courage. She has faced death and came out whole…..A Victor's Tale!!!

Sweetheart, GOD is bigger than everything and everyone. Lean on HIM, The Solid Rock and HE would never fail you!!!

About your inlaws, forgive them in your heart, and concentrate your energy on yourself and your children, they didnt make you and they cannot break you except you allow them to. Follow your heart and your dreams, don't let go!! You may want to give up at times, but remember you may fall but you are a champion if you conquer each fall by rising again.

Let loose the emotions, confusions and the why me questions and move on beyond the Aboderins.

littleedmonds@yahoo.com

Anonymous April 14, 2006 - 6:31 pm

Just Keep having faith.

-In God be the Glory-

P.Patra Sherman April 12, 2006 - 8:34 am

Stella,jus take heart God is in control of ur situation.Ur kids and urself will have all the fullest of joy in this world by the grace of the almighty.Amen.

Aretha kange April 12, 2006 - 8:27 am

Remember SDA that God is still on the throne. There's a voice in the Bible that says:Blessed are those that mourn for they shall be comforted.(Matt5:8). Take heart yah!

Anonymous April 11, 2006 - 6:48 pm

stella dont worry God will surely see u true and continue to pray

chinwe April 11, 2006 - 11:16 am

My sister, it is well. The good Lord will never forsake you and the kids

Anonymous April 9, 2006 - 2:48 pm

God know the truth and the best stella as for your children please take care of them as your husband would have done i am your fan and i am also behind you

concerned citizen April 7, 2006 - 4:53 am

SDA, the Lord is your strength. You know where it hurts, people can say all they want and nobody is in the position to judge anybody, especially a widow.

Please give this young lady a break, she has a enough to worry about.

Stella, once again it is well and the good Lord will see you through, I know what it means to loose a loved one.

Anonymous April 5, 2006 - 8:15 pm

just kip it going.God is ur strenght.

remi April 4, 2006 - 4:16 pm

I lost my brother in a motor accident in orlando,florida on the 18th of december,2004 just 2 weeks after jaiye's death,he was on vacation from london with his family,his kids survived,his wife and the baby were in the hotel when it happened,believe me,i can say i understand where she is coming from,talking to somebody now and another moment his gone,it's as if the world will come to an end,but believe me it's a wound that is only jesus can heal,it's a trying period for wife,aged-parents and family,but believe it you will surely overcome,stay blessed.

Anonymous April 4, 2006 - 2:04 pm

Keep d determination going girl i admire ur courage

Linda Beri April 4, 2006 - 10:05 am

Oh God, i don't just know what to say. Stella please stay blessed God takes care of all his children. Don't forget that we are in Africa, they most always talk. I am one of your fans, i am a Cameroonian and stay in Cameroon. I really cried when i read your this article, please don't listened to them, do what comes out of your mind, they will be the first people to laugh at you if you give up. Take care of your children and your late husband will be proud of you. He is not dead, he sees you and knows your mind and still loves you. God bless you once more and your kid.

Anonymous April 4, 2006 - 3:59 am

God Bless you Stella and those lovely children. Things will certainly work out for you. Sis, Please keep your head up.

salome April 3, 2006 - 8:36 am

Keep it up Stella. God is in your side. I like your faith and confidence.

Anonymous April 1, 2006 - 5:28 pm

i pray God gives her strength

mariam April 1, 2006 - 4:16 pm

hi stella i read your interview and it was very very interesting all i can tell you is to live everything to good because he don't do anything for nothing your husband know you love's him even before he died and he knew you still love's him even after he died so please take good care of your two daugters and enjoy your life don't mine what the media says or some of his family members are saying and remember that you are a good actress and a beautiful lady so don't throw that away for nobody and always celebret your husband's life god bless you and your kids on anything your do in your life loooooooooooooove your and good luck one of your bigger's fan in the word from the u s a till next time bye bye

ola April 1, 2006 - 10:14 am

i cant believe that things like this still happen in nigeria in this day and age where people always blame a woman for her husbands dead.and most of the people that spread the rumours are women like us i cant understand the madness, i am a 24 yr old and i can realy relate to the story i was virtually in tears coz i dont know wot i wouldve done if i were in her shoes.stella i want u to know that ure a very strong woman and God bless u and ur children i dont know wot ill do today if my husband dies and so i just want u to know dat God cant give us more than u can handle, God bless u again and people-esp women this life is actually a wonderful place to live its people like u and i that makes it difficult for each other.take stell and know that there are people around that have your back.

Anonymous March 31, 2006 - 4:15 pm

Excellent interview

Anonymous March 31, 2006 - 2:27 pm

Stella, keep your head up, because GOD will always be there to guide you and your children. Remain blessed. Annie

selasi March 31, 2006 - 12:35 pm

Dear Stella in christ, my heart really goes for you but one thing i can ensure you with is that hold on to your faith and look up unto God and remember that is with you in all things and his words says that in all things give thanks to him. I believe when it happened you asked your self a lot of qusestions but before you knew one year has already approached. i know it is not easy but God will put your feet on another higher lever.

God be with your and his blood will protect you and your children. I wish i can have your number to call and give you words of exaltation.

have a blessed weekend

temi March 31, 2006 - 10:46 am

i have always loved SDA and i still love her and i am praying for her and her kids and by the way SDA i will be hiring you to plan my wedding God speare our lives and i am not joking so as soon as you finalize things with your ANGELS AND BELLS shop and MON AFRIQUE pleaseeeee send me a brochure i am dead serious. TAKE care and i do hope this gets to you

Anonymous March 31, 2006 - 10:42 am

i actully cried while reading this interview. all that happened to her if you think about it is what i would have expected to happen to someone people are so envious of but somthing i would have thought would happen was that her husband's family would say okay oh the past is the past lets do what we can for her and her children ( what is left of our son and brother) but its sad to see that some people just don't care. anyway sha i am praying for her oh and God be with her

Anonymous March 31, 2006 - 9:10 am

This is just wonderful, and it goes to make people understand that stella damascus is just another human being as all of us, and that she should be left alone to recover from the dead of her husband quietly.it really brave when you hear what she has to say about all that has being going on, she is a very brave woman and the lord will protect her as long as she lives so that she can take care of her children.

l am a fan of stella,l was also born in lagos to cameroonian parents, l lived all my life in cameroon, and l am berlin now. l just want you to know l am praying for you and that those who think negative publicty will bring food to their tables while the write stupid things about you should take a step behind and rethink,because it will make you more stronger.

you are the most beautiful woman in nollywood industry and no matter what he or she says, you will remain one of the best actress the industry has ever layed hands on,and l want you to be strong for those kids,beacuse there are too young and they need you to work hard for them so that their late father will be proud of you and the children.

As for me one of your best fans, l just want you to know l love you so much and will always pray for you and no matter what happens l want you to always keep in mind that all what you said about you husband and they tough times you went through l will never forget,this article l just read.

stay blessed and may the lord protect you from all evil and may you live long with your two daughters. in case you want to reply me this is my email chalex_x@yahoo.com

your fan albert chia.

Anonymous March 31, 2006 - 8:33 am

I can't say that I know what Stella is going through, because I don't. But I pray that God gives her the strenght to go through this. God knows the pain she's going through and He'll carry her through. Good questions and responses

Anonymous March 30, 2006 - 6:26 pm

not bad atall

Anonymous March 30, 2006 - 2:31 pm

I am really impressed that city people is finally telling the truth for once, you guys seem to have lost your credibility over time and have been tagged the lamest gossip mag…but this article is beautiful, and more of this could restore your lost glory.

Anonymous March 30, 2006 - 1:08 pm

One of the most sincere interviews ever!!

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