Sabella Ogbobode Abidde

Please, do not ask me about religion. I get the evil look every time I tell people I am an agnostic who teeters on atheism. My world resolves around ethics and the rule of law. That’s it. I have no use for religion: religious convictions are not part of my existence -- the laws of man are good enough for me. I have lived in several cities: Seattle, Miami, Norman, Minneapolis-Saint Paul, Saint Cloud, the District of Columbia, Houston, and Mankato. I am not sure where I am going to live next. And I have never really had a profession, only jobs: been a cook, a dishwasher, a civil servant, house cleaner, university instructor and researcher and so on and so forth. Every so often I get questions concerning the role and place of the African woman. Well, I don’t know; at least not with any certainty. What seems to work best is when both partners work as a team: cooperate, coordinate and collaborate their marital efforts. And they should be mindful of the insidious effect of modernization on the African family.

The Problem with Single African Women

Every Nigerian man I know would rather marry a Nigerian woman. But sadly, these women want to know the type of car one drives, whether one lives in a home with a 2-car-garage or in an apartment...

African Marriages As Business Ventures

There was a time when Africans, especially the men, kept to their promise of someday returning home to marry the women they left behind. Those days are mostly long gone...

Nigerian Men and their Foreign Wives

Culturally, Nigerian men are overbearing, controlling, and paternalistic.  They relate to their fathers and mothers differently. They believe it is “a man’s world” and so they have the tendency to relegate women to subservient roles. I am stunned by the transformation Nigerian men, married to non-Nigerian women, have gone through in the United States...

Advise from a well-known Nigerian Chief

Let men tell you what I have been telling anyone who would listen: if you are in a position to steal public money, please, by all means, do so! If you don't, you are a bloody fool...

Readers' Responses to a Labor of Love

There are times when I think I need a personal assistant to help with responding to the emails I receive from readers on a daily basis. In all, one can never tell how readers will respond to any given essay...

Readers' Responses to a Labor of Love

There are times when I think I need a personal assistant to help with responding to the emails I receive from readers on a daily basis. In all, one can never tell how readers will respond to any given essay...

Why Does The Black Community Hate Nigerians?

Every where I go, I hear Congolese, Togolese, Sierra Leonean, Liberians and South Africans and others speak ill of Nigerians. They hate the fact that Nigerians are "too aggressive," "too dishonest," "love to show off their wealth," and are "always loud..."

Ok…I Confess!

I like the Bible. Anybody can quote from the Bible. Whether you are a correct or fake pastor, a thief, a swindler, a dream peddler or whatever, it doesn't matter. There is a place for you in the Holy Book...

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