I just told you my brother is sleeping with my wife. You want me to take him on a cruise? Is that some sort of reward for banging my wife?

There’s nothing we don’t sell on the telephone now. Prescription drugs, guns, assassins for hire, US visas… As long as it brings in a couple of Dollars, we’re into it…

This is Raheema calling from Hollywood Hereafter Resources. I just wanted to let you know that we have reserved a free burial space for you at the New Island Cemetery…

Why do Nigerians visiting America get all judgmental about the way we live here? Don’t they pay bills in Nigeria? They don't? Ah, that explains why they never have electricity or water…

Excuse me, the plane will not take off unless you fasten your seat belt and switch off that phone…Why do Nigerians ring up friends to inform them the plane is about to take off?

First I heard of McGreevey, I was just arriving the United States and he was giving Christie Whitman a lot of sleepless nights…

First I heard of McGreevey, I was just arriving the United States and he was giving Christie Whitman a lot of sleepless nights…

You have to find your own Nigerian husband before you come to America or you will have a tough task of it. All the good men are gone. Only the credit card swipers are left.