Valentine’s Day…Still Looking for Love

by Sabella Ogbobode Abidde

Right around this time last year, I lamented the fact that Valentine’s Day, like all other holidays in the United States, had become commercialized. My lamentation aside, I was hoping to be propositioned by a most beautiful girl who would tell me how much she really wanted me, and how much she really loved me. I didn’t want roses, I didn’t want diamonds; all I wanted was for her to tell me she couldn’t live without me or that her life would be incomplete without me. I wanted to know that I was the wind beneath her wings, the only sugar in her cup of coffee, the only pepper in her pepper-soup, and that I was the only star in her sky. But it never happened. One year later, I am still waiting.

Why do I have to wait this long for the “it” woman to come into my world. Why? You see, not just any woman would do. She must be a 10, a perfect 10 in every way and on all scale of measurement. I know she is out there looking, looking for me. She just hasn’t found me, yet. But am here…waiting for her to discover me, to chase me and then throw her self at my feet.

In case you are wondering what my attributes are and what I will bring to the table, well, you need not worry. You see, being me is enough. My presence is enough. I am a gift all by myself. I, me and myself is all a woman really needs. Nothing more! When you’ve done the things I have done, seen the things I have seen, and been where I have been, you’ll truly begin to get it and appreciate where I am coming from. It is not easy being me, you know. Men like me don’t come around that often.

Let me digress a bit: the last time I was in Houston, Texas I saw this damsel. It was at a New Year party given by a Nigerian family. But unfortunately, she didn’t see me. If she had, I am sure she would have thrown herself at me. Describing her would take too much of my time, so let me just say she was up there, a 7 perhaps. The content and flow of her mind and her worldview would have made her a 10. Ones Weltanschauung — the overall perspective from which one sees and interprets the world, the collection of beliefs about life and the universe — matters to me. But since we didn’t get to interact, I couldn’t tell, I couldn’t ten her. However, she had this incandescent quality about her.

And now back to the issue of love and valentine. It took me forever to buy flowers for women. Damn! You spend fifty dollars on flowers, four days later they shrivel and dry out and die. It also cost a little fortune to buy cards and flowers and chocolate and a decent bottle of wine. You do all these just for the end game? I’d rather just go to the end game (which is quick and better and without all the fanfare).Send me a card or email me or call me if you have my number. Make your case. On this Valentine Day, as in earlier Valentine’s Day, I am looking forward to being chased by the most beautiful woman there ever is. So, if you are…talk to me…I will make space for you in my heart and in my world. On this Valentine’s Day just tell me that you love me. That’s all I want.

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Desiree' April 2, 2007 - 8:05 pm

OOOO I rate this excellent for humour! It is a good thing you aren't serious bout all this! I love a man wit a sense of humour…and for the record…being me…is more than good enough 😉

Denise March 5, 2007 - 3:47 am

Hi, you are so cute and humorous, i just love reading your articles, good luck with your number10

Sabella Abidde February 21, 2007 - 7:29 pm

Common, where is your sense of humor?

Sabella Abidde February 21, 2007 - 7:28 pm

Rosie I am a 5. That should enough. In fact that is good enough

Opeyemi February 21, 2007 - 4:19 pm

Uh Sabella I've read a lot of you material in the aspect of relationships. Me thinks an internal audit might help you on ur way to getting the perfect score.

I am curious as to how many desperately seeking susans responded to your personal ad. You would do better however to join one of those exclusive speed dating clubs. I understand the men have to have incomes/assets or an inheritance well above 2 million and all the women have to be is drop dead gorgeous.

An African at heart February 21, 2007 - 1:01 am

Perhaps you might try being a bit more humble and a lot less demanding. When we set super high expectations the chance that they will be met are super small. When people ask me what type of man I like; I say that I will know him when I see him You see that way I won't miss the one that is perfect for me because I am looking for a perfect 10.

Rosie February 20, 2007 - 6:32 pm

So Sabella,

Are you a 10 "in every way?"

Bennie Droese February 13, 2007 - 12:02 pm

Sabella my brother,

Perhaps like that urban cowboy,in that country song by Waylon Jennings, you have been looking for love in all the wrong places and in all the wrong faces 🙂

Anyhow, may you and that perfect 10 soul mate of yours find each other…reeaaaaaaaaaall sooooooon!

Best regards and happy valentines.


wishes for you February 12, 2007 - 5:35 am

Sabella, This Valentine Day may perchance bring you the love you are waiting for… you may find "her" just round the corner… also waiting for you


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